9 July, 2024 10:01

Hi and good morning. I’ve been on extended sick leave…which, of course I did in the stupidest, naive way self-sabatoging way possible. Instead of just staying home a few days… and getting a sick leave note from my doctor, I … well, was apparently too honest and said – I need time off. In truth everyday was a real struggle. The internal screaming, sorrows, worries, anger … all were and are real. I moved — due to reasons to a country self-promoted as the homeland of the jews..and for 17 years stayed. In that time and before, seemingly forever, Israel has been and is in a war. Not always in the grand way the movies and TV show. Not in armies charging across battlefields…. perhaps it was never like that? we all imagine war… anyway… last week and this gave me much sun, sand, surf, some light breakfasts, with every present AC in the car, WiFi, Internet, foods at a click of a button, or human wait staff. The war of the absurd. While "the rest of us" all partake and enjoy all the comforts of 2024 society, thousand and thousands of our dear brothers and sisters get sent to war. In Gaza, in the North, in Judea Samera villages, towns. People oddly drive to 100% arab towns for cheap vegetables and get murdered. A 19/20 year old from an Arab Israeli village goes to one of our endless malls, walks around and the stabs two in uniform soldiers [at least one had his standard weapon on him]. So more guns solving anything???? Having a weapon is no longer a deterient. The ones that want to attack will. They want to die. They’ve been sold martydom. What do we sell??? Another memorial day ceremony? What is our over arching motivation? What drives OUR side?? Self preservation, the right to life. The want / need to "just" have 1 homeland — somewhere??? We’ve tried everywhere. And so and so forth. What about them? The arabs? Do they not "want" the same? Perhaps… all we get are the real terror headlines [definitely not fake]. One would have to be totally willingly naive to think we will get to anywhere close to long lasting peace… the kind we imagine is happening in say, South Korea, or Singapore, or …where is there that truly the people are generally happy??? oh yeh, all those wonderful [supposedly Nordic / Scandanivian ] countries. Yeh sure, peel back the onion layers… where ever there are humans, there is suffering. Budda preaches [?] to reach some state called Nirvana where the cycle of suffering ends. Christians say their guy died for sins, and to put the suffering on His death and re-birth [etc]. Islam? well supposedly serve alla in perfect dedication, life life and get virgins? [ how do they sell this to women]???